Monday, 4 May 2015

Germany - The curious events of May 3rd, 2015

This is an unedited Facebook message posted by Hannah's sister, Lucy (pictured below), about our experience with the transportation officers in Berlin. It is definitely worth a read: you might discover how we all felt as the experience progressed...

Lucy and I during happier moments in Prague.

Disclaimer: Germany is a beautiful country and this one story does not reflect the loveliness that can be found there. I would still highly suggest people visit Germany, not just to see the wonderful sights, but also to deliver a message should they ever meet these assholes. 

Since I threatened the police officers and the ticket agents that I would do this, I must follow through with my promises. Today these two nasty ticket agents pictured above decided to take advantage of my family. This all started because we had originally bought what we thought were 48 hour tickets on Friday from a friendly official ticket lady. It turned out she had given us misinformation and our tickets only lasted two days - instead of a full 48 hours as she told us. A small distinction, but in Germany this is a massive deal. Possibly this is why two world wars started here? Anyways, we assumed that if we bought the tickets on Friday late morning then we had 48 hours until Sunday morning when we would be finishing our last trip around Berlin. We were pulled off the train by the very rude ticket lady who asked for our passports and informed us that we had committed a egregious German crime. She decided she needed reinforcements due to my family's insistent protests of innocence and ignorance of these tickets and got the second bastard in the picture to help. This guy proceeded to tell my sisters and me that this is a crime in Germany and we needed to shut up - which I don't take kindly to, and therefore told him they must be extremely bored in his country if they get upset at a FAMILY who obviously was given incorrect information. Things escalated from there, since these two tossers wanted to intimidate us so they called the cops in. Germany must be doing really well for them to have wasted a full half of an hour on a lovely family with a sweet hearted knitting mother, a family oriented business man father, a gentle Welshman, and some loving, yet mildly aggressive when threatened daughters. 

The John Lennon Wall in Prague - €240 cheaper to see than Berlin's equivalent

The cops unfortunately decided to take the side of the austere ticket agents who clearly had nothing better to do with their own lives, and threatened to report us or we pay 40 euros for each person. That works out to be €240 ($266) for a family who had absolutely no idea we were doing anything wrong - forgive us for listening to an official ticket agent and not assuming that she was lying to us. I suggested they report us so we can take this to a higher level of absurdity since it appeared that the German police officers clearly have nothing better to do with their time. I also offered for them to go to America where we have proper criminals who commit actual crimes, rather than use incorrect train tickets. The German police officer assured me that they do have bigger crimes but declined my invitation to go deal with them instead of with the asshole ticket agents who were so bored with their lives that they harass families enjoying their holidays. 

We agreed to pay the fine (well everyone but I agreed, because as a youngest child I innately want to fight something to the furthest extent or until someone gives in due to exhaustion) and interestingly enough the ticket agents refused to let us take down their names. I asked them how we could discern whether this was a fine from a bribery but at that time wanker agent #2 decided he didn't speak English anymore. Convenient.

After some more battling back and forth including a rather amusing moment when Sal was trying to make our point of clear innocence and she must have accidentally pronounced her 's' with a little too much vengeance (we've all be there folks, come on) and the ticket agent leapt back in shock and disgust that would have won him an Oscar and accused Sally of spitting on him. Bitchy agent #1 seized the chance and attempted to add on to our list of atrocious crimes spitting on an officer. Agent #1 scavenged his arm for traces of spit and upon discovering that he was being a little bitch and no one spat on him just began gesticulating wildly at us. While I was happy to engage I was unfortunately pulled back by my more cautious family members. 

Despite various more aggressive and savage insults sent back and forth we paid the money, I surreptitiously took a picture of the two tossers (which was a small victory since they told me that was also illegal) and we all went on our way. 

Moral to the story: Germany is a beautiful country with incredible sights to see, and lots of lovely people to meet. Unfortunately we met the four biggest tossers in town, but we refuse to let their appalling behavior, lack of empathy, and downright rudeness ruin our holiday. I will advise all future holiday makers going to Berlin to remember to confirm their tickets before getting on a train, and also if they happen to see these two pricks, especially the guy, tell him that feisty blonde from that stupid incorrect train ticket situation said what's up asshole, I got your picture, come and get me now bitch.

Most Germans, such as those who worked in this restaurant, are friendly and hospitable. 

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