The Travelling Teacher: Malawi - Baboons at breakfast

January 1-4

Hello everyone!

Let’s face facts: for many people, 2020 was not a great year. We’re all hoping that 2021 will bring more happiness, freedom and a return to many of the elements of human life that we dearly miss.

The hippo laughs at such optimism

Running at Luwawa

My first day of 2021 could actually have ended up worse. I hadn’t made it to midnight on New Year’s Eve. Starting to feel a bit strange after eating fish and rice, I was asleep before 9pm. I frequently woke up sweating or shivering and with my muscles feeling as if they had done an IronMan the day before. I’d felt like this once before. That time, I had stage 3 malaria. Uh oh.

A pre-Covid era, 2019

So away from the disappointing Maji Zuwa I went, speeding off towards northern Malawi’s biggest city of Mzuzu to find some half-decent healthcare. Well, I tried to speed. On the country’s main road I came across this…

At least 20 petrol tankers in this line. The blue bus
is trying to give enough room to the white truck, without
falling off the edge of the cliff. No pressure...

I wasn’t entirely sure why so many petrol tankers were parked on the side of the road. Eventually I was able to squeeze past. A couple more upward hairpin turns took me to the answer…

'Emergency road'. Quite a few cars needed a push.

I certainly didn’t appreciate being told I would have to pay to use the ‘emergency road’. I told them I’d give them some money if I needed a push. I didn’t. They then stood in front of the car saying ‘Give me money.’ I bollocked them for being rude, gave them a note, and drove off before there could be any further repercussions. People saying ‘Give me money’ and not knowing any other English really irritates me about Malawi at times.

Where I spent about 6 minutes
wondering if I had malaria

A rainy, meandering drive got me to Mzuzu an hour later than anticipated. Still plenty of time to get a malaria test though. They are free in hospitals, and quickly concluded that I didn’t have malaria. That would not have been a good start to 2021. I didn’t feel great (though being able to drive for almost 4 hours made me think my condition was improving) so spent my day shopping for future food supplies and then at Macondo Camp, an Italian-owned campsite and restaurant in the city.

I was tempted to buy one of the larger watermelons you're
likely to find on Earth, but opted for an orange instead

Aside from a few jelly beans, my first food of 2021 came that evening, with me stomaching half a plate of homemade tagliatelle carbonara. The following morning my appetite had returned. Banana pancakes were wolfed down whilst waiting for the rain to abate enough for me to pack up the tent before heading northwest.

Packing up a wet tent: always fun

I was heading to Vwaza Marsh Wildlife Reserve, a moderately-sized area of land on the border with Zambia. Genuinely, one of the main reasons for me driving up there was because it was the name of my first classroom at school. It is possibly the least-known and least-visited wildlife area in the country. The quality of the signage on the drive suggested a place way past its peak.

The drive took a little over 2 hours

Incredibly faded, you can just about make out
the name and arrow for Vwaza Marsh

This was reflected in the fact that I was the only visitor. The Lilongwe Wildlife Trust have a base here but there are currently no volunteers (blame Covid). There were no ‘guides’ like in other national parks here.

Camping: 8,000MWK. Staying in here: 10,000MWK.
No. Contest.

Which is a shame when you see the view…

Lake Kazuni

Impala soon after sunrise, with mountains in
the background, made for a lovely wakeup view

...and then notice what is inside the lake…

The big blob sticking out of the water...

You don't want to get in the way of that!

I do like a hippo. There are hundreds of them all in this small lake. Makes you wonder how they got there, really. Doubt they migrated from Zambia just for this.

Estimates state that there are over 500 hippo in the lake

I'm watching you...

Lake Kazuni is a bit too big - and dangerous - to walk around. A ranger called Kenneth was therefore summoned to accompany me with his rather large rifle in my car. Being wet season, there are many places other than the lake where the most interesting animals (elephants, lions, leopards and such) can get a drink. We were driving around to find them.

Always a sign of an underwhelming drive
when pictures of impala are used

Moving branches was a main action point

We didn’t. Elephants hadn’t been seen for the three days before I came, and weren’t seen during my time at Vwaza Marsh. Still, it allowed me to get a little bit closer to the rafts of hippo further down the lakeside.

Egyptian geese. "Not from Egypt," Kenneth stated.

Mother and calf hanging by the water's edge

A brisk early morning walk was similarly unsuccessful, though we did get to see some smaller insects which would be missed in a vehicle. The rhino beetle below is one of the ‘Little Five’.

The rhino beetle

This beautiful vivid crab-like creature
popped up regularly near the lake

I had done our morning walk using my white trainers. They got muddy, obviously, but there was a reason I had to use these. My normal walking trainers are blue. Wearing blue - or black - is a no-no in Vwaza. This is due to the park being home to a number of tsetse flies. These are rather dangerous to humans and other animals as they can pass on a disease known as ‘sleeping sickness’. It is treatable. If you don’t get it treated, however, you usually...die.

New York Times picture of a tsetse fly

To combat the tsetse fly, the park has put up numerous large pieces of blue and black fabric. Kenneth called it the Vwaza flag. The idea is that the fly is initially attracted by the blue part of the flag. It then notices the black part in the middle, which has been treated. When it lands on the black part, one of two things will normally happen:

fly death;
fly infertility.

Over time, the number of flies should fall and the threat should diminish. I know that they are trying something similar with mosquitoes in other parts of Africa. Wouldn’t it be great if the minds who feel they have sorted a Covid vaccine all turned their attention to eradicating malaria and sleeping sickness? One can dream…

The 'Vwaza Flag'

Arguably the most thrilling wildlife interactions came without the ranger present. The first was after the Sun went down. This is when hippos, commonly known as one of Africa’s most dangerous creatures, come out of the water to graze. This is also when I was planning to cook and eat my own food. In an area quite close to the lake. Oh, and the only light sources are my phone and torch. There is absolutely zero electricity here. Eventually a night guard came...with a cook (Bertha called herself the ‘lodge attendant’, which I thought was a brilliant title), who wanted to cook for me. Using my equipment, naturally. Did I mention there were hippos nearby?

Wanting to give Bertha a bit of extra cash to help her children, I arranged for her to cook eggs on toast for me after the morning walk. She somehow managed to use the remaining half of my gas canister when doing so. She more than redeemed herself when a congress of baboons (yes, I looked that up) came charging over as I was trying to load things into the car. Things like food. Which baboons like. A lot. It was when one of them, sitting on the wing mirror, started clawing at the window that Bertha came over. She essentially sat by the car to intimidate them whilst I loaded everything in.

Tasted slightly better than it looked. Slightly.

There were at least 15 in total, of all ages

As if the car hasn't been through
enough over the past week...

Vwaza Marsh was the last main port of call on my northern Malawi excursion. The drive back to Lilongwe was an optimistic seven hours, so I broke it up over two days and stopped at Luwawa in the forest on the way home. Interestingly, this was the strictest place for Covid that I saw on my trip. A reminder of why I staycationed in the first place.

It was also no overnight guests unless
they had been told in advance...

...or brought your own tent. Lucky me!

Luwawa Dam

Aside from Nkhata Bay, many of the places I have visited on this adventure were new to me. Even in my fifth year of living in the Warm Heart of Africa, I am still finding new, interesting places to visit. Many of these are too far away from Lilongwe to visit without having a significant amount of free time. Most are worth it, and I always have to remind myself of how lucky I have been to be able to travel at all.